Divorce is rarely easy, even when both partners agree that ending the marriage is the right decision. Many couples, hoping to keep things simple and inexpensive, consider handling the legal process themselves—what’s known as a do-it-yourself (DIY) divorce. On the surface, it seems like a practical choice, especially if there are no bitter disputes over assets or child custody.
But what many don’t realize is that DIY divorce comes with hidden legal dangers that can turn what seems like a straightforward split into an expensive, stressful legal battle. Minor paperwork errors, misunderstandings about financial obligations, or oversights in custody agreements can cause serious complications—sometimes years down the road.
If you’re considering a DIY divorce, it’s crucial to understand the risks before you sign anything. Let’s explore why some couples choose to go it alone, and the biggest legal pitfalls you should be aware of before making this life-changing decision.
Understanding DIY Divorce: Why Some Couples Choose to Go It Alone
DIY divorce is appealing for several reasons, but the most common motivation is cost. Divorce attorneys can be expensive, and if a couple believes they have a simple, uncontested case, they may think hiring a lawyer is unnecessary.
Other reasons include:
- A desire for privacy, avoiding courtroom drama, and keeping personal matters out of the legal system as much as possible.
- A belief that their split is amicable enough to work through the details without outside interference.
- Misinformation—many people assume that divorce is just filling out forms and filing them with the court.
While a DIY approach might work in rare cases, most divorces involve complexities that the average person isn’t prepared to handle. Legal systems are full of technicalities, and even minor errors can lead to significant financial and legal consequences. Below are the most serious risks you need to consider before proceeding without professional guidance.
Risk #1: Costly Mistakes in Legal Paperwork
Divorce involves extensive paperwork, and courts have strict rules about what documents must be filed and when. Missing a deadline or filling out a form incorrectly can result in rejected filings, delayed proceedings, or, in some cases, an invalid divorce agreement.
One common mistake is failing to fully outline the terms of the divorce settlement. Many DIY divorce agreements lack clear language about property division, alimony, or future financial responsibilities. If something is unclear or improperly documented, one spouse may later challenge the agreement, leading to costly legal battles.
Another frequent error is overlooking jurisdictional requirements. Different states have different divorce laws, and if you don’t file in the right place or follow the correct procedures, your divorce may not be legally valid at all. For example, in New Jersey, at least one spouse must have lived in the state for a minimum of one year before filing for divorce, and specific grounds for divorce must be established under state law.
Legal paperwork might seem straightforward, but even small technical mistakes can cost thousands of dollars to fix—sometimes requiring court intervention or even starting the process over.
Risk #2: Unintended Financial Consequences
Dividing finances during a divorce isn’t just about deciding who keeps the house or the car. It involves debt, tax implications, retirement accounts, and spousal support obligations—issues that can have long-term financial consequences if mishandled.
One major risk is miscalculating alimony or child support payments. Without proper legal guidance, one spouse might agree to payments that are unfair or unsustainable. Some may underestimate their financial needs, while others might unknowingly take on more financial responsibility than necessary.
Another hidden danger is tax liability. Selling or transferring property, cashing out retirement funds, or dividing business assets can trigger unexpected tax burdens. A divorce attorney can help ensure that assets are divided in the most tax-efficient way possible, preventing financial surprises after the divorce is finalized.
Without proper financial planning, a DIY divorce can leave one or both spouses in serious financial distress, with no legal recourse to fix the situation later.
Risk #3: Custody Complications and Parental Rights Issues
If you and your spouse have children, the stakes of divorce are even higher. Child custody laws are complex, and DIY agreements often fail to address critical details, leading to disputes, resentment, and even court battles down the line.
Some of the most common issues include:
- Vague custody agreements – If your parenting plan isn’t clearly defined, disagreements over schedules, holidays, and decision-making authority can quickly spiral into conflict.
- Failure to address relocation – If one parent decides to move to another state or even another city, custody arrangements may need to be reevaluated. Without a legally sound agreement, relocation disputes can become highly contentious.
- Parental rights misunderstandings – Many DIY agreements fail to include proper legal language, leading to situations where one parent unknowingly signs away certain rights.
Custody battles can be emotionally and financially draining, and courts always prioritize the best interests of the child—something that may not be properly accounted for in a DIY divorce agreement. A skilled divorce attorney ensures that your parental rights are protected and that the custody arrangement is legally enforceable.
Risk #4: Hidden Debts and Asset Division Disputes
Many couples assume they know everything about their shared finances—until they get divorced. One of the biggest risks of DIY divorce is failing to properly divide assets and debts, leaving one spouse unknowingly responsible for financial obligations they didn’t expect.
For example:
- Undisclosed debts – If one spouse secretly racked up credit card debt or took out loans during the marriage, both parties may still be legally responsible if it was a shared account.
- Retirement accounts – Many DIY agreements overlook the need for a Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO), which is required to divide 401(k)s or pensions properly.
- Business assets – If one spouse owns a business, failing to accurately value and divide business assets can lead to significant financial losses.
An experienced divorce lawyer ensures that all debts and assets are properly accounted for and divided, protecting you from future financial surprises.
Risk #5: The Emotional and Legal Toll of Courtroom Battles
Many couples opt for DIY divorce to avoid courtroom stress. Ironically, many DIY divorces lead to court battles anyway—often because the initial agreement was incomplete, unfair, or legally unenforceable.
Common reasons DIY divorces end up in court include:
- Disagreements over child custody modifications
- Challenges to spousal support payments
- Disputes over assets or hidden financial obligations
- One spouse changing their mind and contesting the agreement later
When this happens, both parties may end up spending far more money on litigation than they would have if they had hired a divorce attorney in the first place. The emotional stress of prolonged legal disputes can also take a serious toll on both spouses and their children.
Why a Divorce Attorney Is Your Best Protection
While DIY divorce may seem like an easy and cost-effective solution, the hidden risks can far outweigh any short-term savings. From paperwork errors and financial missteps to custody disputes and courtroom battles, the consequences of going it alone can be devastating.
A divorce attorney from DeTommaso Law Group, LLC provides the legal skills and experience necessary to protect your rights, your finances, and your future. We ensure that your agreement is legally sound, financially fair, and enforceable, giving you peace of mind that everything has been handled correctly.
Instead of risking costly mistakes, consider seeking legal guidance. Your future—and your financial stability—deserve the right protection.
Don’t face the challenges of divorce alone. Call us at (908) 274-3028 or fill out our online form to book a consultation.